December 2011

You know one of the (admittedly, many) things that makes me crazy, Poppets? Not getting closure. It’s right up there with people who go the speed limit in the passing lane and even above people who put spoilers in comments without giving fair warning. Yep, getting closure is important to me. So, imagine my relief when Shawn Harris agreed to a follow-up interview with me. To remind you, Shawn is the playwright behind Tulpa or Anne&Me that I spoke with back in May. BUT! We spoke before the show went up at the Planet Connections Theatre Festivity. Which meant, I really needed to know how it went and what happens next. Luckily, she was willing to fill me in…

Bridget Adams (BA): The very first question I have to ask is: How did last summer’s
performances go?

Shawn Harris (SH): Planet Connections went very well! We had great performances, and the show got a couple of nominations for awards. Attendance was solid considering when we had to perform. The thing about festivals is that you don't get your choice of performance slots, so you make the best of what's available. Our last 2 shows nearly sold out, though! I'm very happy about how things turned out.

But more than that, people were interested and engaged with what they saw, so in that regard it was a phenomenal success.

BA:  At the time, I said I believed the goal to be to create an honest dialogue around race and racism and asked if you thought Tulpa was succeeding. You said you thought it was too soon to say. How about now?

SH: Right. Now that I've been able to observe people's reactions to the play, I think it does do that.

One of the great things about theatre is that it's a lot like a thrill ride. You can go along with the action without putting yourself at risk. For many of us, we don't know how we'd handle the situations raised in Tulpa until we suddenly find ourselves face-to-face with
them. While we can learn from these experiences, the cost of that is often a lot of pain, both inflicted and endured. It's a lot like talking about "a friend of mine" who has a problem. Only in this case they're live human beings doing human things.

At the same time, the distance allows people to examine these events more closely to get a better understanding of how they work. This is in no small part due to the facilitation of the Anti-Racist Alliance's women of color group (via the People's Institute for Survival and Beyond), who were able to combine a personal approach with anti-racist
analysis.

BA: Is an honest dialogue about race still something you want to accomplish with Tulpa?

SH: Yes. The purpose of that goal has changed, though. One of the reasons why the post-performance discussion was so valuable was that it showed Tulpa's potential to not only initiate these dialogues but to facilitate and sustain them. Looking at how much substance audience members brought to these discussions showed me that there was a lot more that Tulpa could do. Honest dialogue is no longer an end in itself, but a required component of a larger mission. We often say that dialogue is important to improve understanding, but I soon realize that my deeper wish is for people to act on that understanding.

Because of this, one of the long-term goals that has emerged is a practical way to combine making theatre with social justice and community organizing. Making theatre and community organizing have a lot in common. In both cases, you're bringing people together with wildly different temperaments, skills, motives, interests, and so on in order to create or change something. Both theatre and community organizing face similar dilemmas, especially when it comes to doing a big job with few resources.

So, I'm looking at ways in which we can use theatre to help promote social justice while at the same time applying social justice principles to making theatre. Does that make sense?

BA: It makes perfect sense to me. How much has the main character being a Queer woman, as well as Black woman, entered into discussions and/or people’s response?

SH: Honestly, not that much. But when talking with queer women of color, it does come up more often. It's one of those situations where queer find the play REALLY queer while it goes way over the heads of straight cis people. It's not about in-jokes or anything like that, but generally how the characters understand themselves and relate to each other.

BA: What’s going on with Tulpa now? With such a great response, I hope it has a future…

SH: I'd been interested in another performance for a while, but not it looks like there is an opportunity for more performances in mid-to late April. Because of the energy and insight generated at the post-performance discussions, I'm also looking for ways to turn Tulpa, or Anne&Me into a workshop or seminar that can tour in different cities. I'm also working with someone to develop a seminar or workshop using Tulpa as a keystone piece through which we can learn about and examine anti-racist concepts. I have my work cut out for me, but it's work that really means something to me and the people who've been touched by Tulpa, so I don't mind.

Right at this moment, though, I'm putting together a fundraising campaign for the 2012 production of Tulpa, or Anne&Me. I'm trying to raise $3000.00 which will go toward rehearsal space, marketing/publicity/advertising, copies of scripts, props and costumes, tech and design, and -- most importantly -- small stipends for the cast and crew.

BA:  What happens once you get the $3,000.00?

SH: I'm gearing up for a mid- to late April performance here in NYC. As with any project, that depends on how things work out. Right now the main thing is raising money, so I'm putting together a volunteer fundraising team to help with that. After that, I have to hire a cast and crew, book rehearsal space, and so on.

BA: Will it be exactly the same show, or will you make some changes?

SH: Every time I do a show there are changes. I tweak the script, try working with different people, approaching the process differently. I'm very much like a scientist conducting experiments and using what I observe to make my work more interesting, more meaningful, more theatrical, and so on.

BA: What is next for you, as a playwright?

SH: I'm currently working on a script I want to have a complete draft of for NaNoWriMo. (Note from BA: NaNoWriMo is short for “National Novel Writing Month”, an event that takes place every fall to challenge writers to write a whole novel and/or 50,000 words in the month of November and no, Poppets, I’m not participating.) It's a straight-up fantasy about the human slaves who discover lost secrets of magic and use them to rise up against their elven masters. The story is a lot less personal than Tulpa, and I look forward to finishing a draft.

BA: Good luck with the fantasy script and with NaNoWriMo! Finally, Shawn, supporting LGBTQ projects and voices is very important to Betty Pages readers. Where do they go if they want to donate or get more information?

SH: Online, they can go to https://www.fracturedatlas.org/donate/3503. Or they can always email me at whoisyourtulpa@gmail.com.

(Or, my internet-only readers, you can click here.)

And there you have it, Poppets, a little bit of closure for all of us at the end of the year. Feels good, doesn’t it? Yeah, I thought so, too.

Until next month, Poppets, have a safe and happy holiday season whatever you’re celebrating, don’t forget to call a cab, and, as always, take care of you.

November 2011

If you have read this column for any length of time, you may have realized I can be *ahem* a little political. I know, Poppets, it’s a shock. For the most part, this is a good thing. The one problem I have found with being political, though, is it can also make you angry. I can tell you almost every setback, almost every hurdle we face. Hell, I have told you. I’m a little political, after all. There’s a bumper sticker that reads If You’re Not Enraged, You’re Not Paying Attention. Yep. I get it.

But I also get there is a lot of anger in this world already. For me, adding my anger to the mix isn’t always helpful. Often, it’s pointless, at best, and counterproductive, at worst. I mean, isn’t the whole point of being aware, of paying attention, of being a little political is to make things better?

So, in this month of Thanksgiving, instead of railing – although you know I could – I offer you this list of political advances we have made, and for which I am thankful. President Barack Obama has…

• Signed the Matthew Shepard and James Byrd, Jr. Hate Crimes Prevention Act, which expanded existing United States federal hate crime law to include crimes motivated by a victim’s actual or perceived gender, sexual orientation, gender identity, or disability -- the first positive federal LGBT legislation in the nation's history
• Repealed Don't Ask/Don't Tell
• Signed the Ryan White HIV/AIDS Treatment Extension Act
• Reversed US refusal to sign the UN Declaration on Sexual Orientation and Gender Identity
• Extended benefits to same-sex partners of federal employees in 2009 and, further, in 2010
• Lifted the HIV Entry Ban
• Issued diplomatic passports, and provided other benefits, to the partners of same-sex foreign service employees
• Committed to ensuring that federal housing programs are open to all, regardless of sexual orientation or gender identity
• Conceived a National Resource Center for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender Elders -- the nation's first ever -- funded by a three-year HHS grant to SAG
• Banned job discrimination based on gender identity throughout the Federal government (the nation's largest employer)
• Eliminated the discriminatory Census Bureau policy that kept our relationships from being counted, encouraging couples who consider themselves married to file that way, even if their state of residence does not yet permit legal marriage
• Instructed HHS to require any hospital receiving Medicare or Medicaid funds (virtually all hospitals) to allow LGBT visitation rights
• Required all grant applicants seeking HUD funding to comply with state and local anti-discrimination laws that protect LGBT individuals
• Adopted transgender recommendations on the issuance of gender-appropriate passports that will ease barriers to safe travel and that will provide government-issued ID that avoids involuntary "outing" in situations requiring ID, like hiring, where a gender-appropriate driver's license or birth certificate is not available
• Extended domestic violence protections to LGBT victims
• Extended the Family and Medical Leave Act to cover employees taking unpaid leave to care for the children of same-sex partners
• Issued guidance specifically to assist LGBT tenants denied housing on the basis of sexual orientation or gender identity
• Issued a National HIV/AIDS Strategy praised as "long-overdue" by the Task Force, Lambda and others
• Issued guidance to 15,000 local departments of education and 5,000 colleges to support educators in combating bullying
• Cut back authority to discharge under Don't Ask/Don't Tell from hundreds of generals to just 6 civilian appointees, effectively ending discharges while working toward a permanent end to the policy.
• Led the fight that reversed a 2010 UN vote removing sexual orientation from the list of things people should not be killed for
• Launched the first-ever national study of discrimination against members of the LGBT community in the rental and sale of housing
• Determined that Section 3 of DOMA is unconstitutional
• Determined that LGBT discrimination should be subject to a standard of "heightened scrutiny"
• Stopped defending DOMA, leading to "dramatic changes across the country and the federal government in the way that lawyers and judges see legal challenges brought by LGBT people - and, slowly but surely, in the way that LGBT people are able to live their lives"
• Filed an unprecedented brief detailing the history of discrimination faced by gay, lesbian and bisexual people in America, including by the federal government itself -- the single most persuasive legal argument ever advanced by the United States government in support of equality for lesbian, gay and bisexual people
• Vacated a court order that would have deported a gay American's Venezuelan partner
• Begun recognizing joint bankruptcy petitions filed by same-sex married couples
• Endorsed the Respect for Marriage Act
• Reduced the deportation threat faced by binational LGBT couples
• Authorized military chaplains to perform same-sex weddings on or off military bases
• Endorsed the Baldwin-Lieberman bill, The Domestic Partnership Benefits and Obligations Act of 2009, to provide FULL partnership benefits to federal employees
• Released the first Presidential PRIDE proclamations since 2000
• Hosted the first LGBT Pride Month Celebration in White House history
• Awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom to Harvey Milk and Billie Jean King, joining past recipients such as Rosa Parks
• Appointed the first ever transgender DNC member
• Testified in favor of ENDA, the first time any official of any administration has testified in the Senate on ENDA
• Hired more openly LGBT officials (like these) in its first two years -- more than 150, including more than 20 "Senate-confirmables" -- than any previous administration hired in four years or eight
• Sworn in Ambassador David Huebner
• Changed the culture of government everywhere from – among others – HUD and HHS to the Export-Import Bank, the State Department, and the Department of Education
• Appointed Justices Sonia Sotomayor and Elena Kagan, instead of conservatives who would have tilted the Court even further to the right and virtually doomed our rights for a generation.
• Named open transgender appointees (the first President ever to do so)
• Emphasized LGBT inclusion in everything from the President’s historic NAACP address. . . to the first paragraph of his Family Day proclamation and his Mothers Day proclamation . . . to creating the chance for an adorable 10-year-old at the White House Easter Egg roll to tell ABC World News how cool it is to have two mommies . . . to including the chair of the National Gay and Lesbian Chamber of Commerce along with the Secretary of the Treasury and the President of Goldman Sachs in the small audience for the President’s economic address at the New York Stock Exchange . . . to welcoming four gay couples to its first State Dinner
• Recommitted, in a televised address, to passing ENDA . . . repealing Don’t Ask/Don’t Tell . . . repealing the so-called Defense of Marriage Act
• Spoken out against discrimination at the National Prayer Breakfast
• Dispatched the Secretary of Defense and the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff to call on the Senate to repeal Don't Ask / Don't Tell
• Launched a website to gather public comment on first-ever federal LGBT housing discrimination study
• Appointed long-time equality champion Chai Feldblum one of the four Commissioners of the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission
• Produced U.S. Census Bureau PSAs featuring gay, lesbian, and transgender spokespersons
• Appointed Retired Colonel Margarethe Cammermeyer, an early public champion of open service in the military, to the Defense Advisory Committee on Women in the Services
• Publicly invited the shunned Mississippi high school prom student to the White House
• Successfully fought for UN accreditation of IGLHRC (the International Gay & Lesbian Human Rights Commission) -- against Republican attempts to block it
• Convened the first-ever anti-bullying summit to craft a national strategy to reduce bullying in schools
• Launched stopbullying.gov
• Awarded $13.3 million to the LA Gay & Lesbian Center to create a model program for LGBTQ youth in the foster care system
• Tweeted to 5.7 million BarackObama followers and nearly 2 million WhiteHouse followers the President's "It Gets Better" video
• Embraced that campaign with heartfelt messages from, as well, the Vice President, the Secretary of State, the Secretary of Agriculture (aimed particularly at rural youth), the Secretaries of Education and Health & Human Services, the Secretary of Labor (in English and Spanish), the Director of OPM and LGBT members of the White House staff
• Issued a Department of Justice video urging kids to call a Justice Department toll-free number if their school is aware of bullying but taking no action
• Held the first ever White House conference on bullying prevention, led by the President and First Lady
• Hosted first-ever White House transgender policy meeting
• Emphasized the positive value of Gay-straight Student Alliances (GSAs) and advised the nation's school districts of their legal responsibility to allow establishment of GSAs
• Appointed the first openly gay man to serve on the federal bench
• Nominated the first open lesbian US attorney
• Nominated the first openly gay US attorney to serve Texas
• Forced the Tehachipi Unified School District to prevent and respond to gender-based harassment
• Acknowledged in federal court the U.S. government's "significant and regrettable role" in discrimination in America against gays and lesbians, arguing that DOMA is unconstitutional.
• Appointed open lesbian activist to West Point advisory board
• Used the President's annual United Nations address to say, "no country should deny people their rights because of who they love, which is why we must stand up for the rights of gays and lesbians everywhere."
• Presented Janice Langbehn with the Presidential Citizens Award for her role in securing hospital visitation rights

~ compiled by Andrew Tobias, originally posted on www.eQualityGiving.org

Are there still issues? Please. Let’s not insult any of our intelligences by pretending otherwise – or even pretending everything the President said he would do has been done. And yes, we still have to stay aware of those things. But let’s stay aware of these things, as well. Sometimes, being political can mean knowing what to be thankful for.

October 2011

I know, Poppets, I know. Every October, it’s the same thing from me. I’m a broken record. But every October, it’s still Domestic Violence Awareness month. When it no longer needs to be, I’ll write about something else. Until then, I’m going to keep writing about it and trying to break down some of the stigma that goes along with admitting a relationship is unhealthy.

While you know I care about this issue every year, 2011 has been especially poignant for me. Back in January, two dear friends of mine recognized their relationships were abusive. What made it so difficult for both of them is neither was in a physically abusive relationship. Name calling, manipulation, belittling, psychological warfare, sure. But no hitting, no pushing, nothing that would have drawn that definitive line in the sand for either of my friends.

The other thing that made it so hard for both of them was neither of them is a person who is “supposed” to be in an abusive relationship. You know what I mean. We all have this idea of who a victim is, of who an abuser is. Neither of my friends fit that idea. The first one is an Alpha male, by any definition. Physically, mentally and emotionally strong; highly educated, with several degrees on his wall; a college professor type, along the lines of Rupert Giles, of Buffy fame. Not exactly your stereotypical victim.

The other is a woman, also well educated, from a strong, loving home. Her husband is an ordained minister. Not a stereotypical victim, but not your stereotypical abuser, either.

And that’s the way this works: we think we are immune because we aren’t a certain type; our abuser isn’t “one of those people;” we’re Queer, for God’s sake! Domestic violence is a straight problem. Only it’s not; neither of my friends mentioned here are straight. There is no “type.” There is no exempt community or group. There but for the grace of God, and all that. Which is why we must keep talking about it, writing about it, shining the light on it.

That’s where a couple really great organizations come in. Down in Seattle, the NW Network is an LGBT centered organization dealing with Queer and Transgendered domestic violence issues by working “to end violence and abuse by building loving and equitable relationships in our community and across the country.” To get help, offer help, or just to learn more, you can reach them Monday through Friday at 206/568-7777. Closer to home, the Skagit County Domestic Violence and Sexual Assault Services is officially an LGBT safe zone. They offer a 24-hour hotline: 888/336-9591. Finally, the Washington state domestic violence hotline is available 24-hours a day, as well, at 800/562-6025, and its staff is trained to address the needs of our community.

It’s not easy to admit your partner is hurting you. Victims leave their abusers seven times on average, before it finally sticks. But you do not deserve to be belittled or threatened or hurt. And your batterer doesn’t deserve your protection. Neither of you can get better until the violence stops.

As for my friends? I’m pleased to report he got out. Blocked his phone, went to the police, did what he had to do to move on. She…well…I still have hope. I still have hope that one day she’ll leave him for good. Until then, until those of us who love you don’t have to worry any longer, I’ll keep writing, keep working, keep hoping. Broken record or not.

Until next month, Poppets, take care of you.

September 2011

Rejoice, Poppets! One of the greatest controversies of out time has been laid to rest: Bert and Ernie are not gay! I know; this has been keeping you up nights. Me, too!

Or not. However, the issue has been put to rest. With the legalization of same sex marriage in New York, an online petition was launched demanding Bert and Ernie be married on Sesame Street.

 Personally, I think children’s shows should start addressing non-traditional families. Hell yes. Children need to learn that their families, and their friends’ families, are valid and valued, regardless of make-up. Given my deep and long-standing love and respect for Sesame Street, I hope they are the ones to do it. The human beings in charge of the show, however, have made the official announcement that, if they address the issue of LGBT families, it won’t be through Bert and Ernie. Because they aren’t gay.

I’m okay with this. Not because I think kids’ shows should be sexless; I don’t. We deal with mommies having babies and mommies and daddies becoming parents, as appropriate. Not that I think puppet characters can’t be sexual; I don’t. Kermit and Miss Piggy have had a thing for years – as have Gonzo and the chickens, which is far weirder than two gay Muppets, in my opinion. No, I’m okay with this because I do believe boys need to be taught that it is okay for them to have deep, meaningful, emotional, platonic relationships with other boys. We were kind of, sort of taught this in the ‘70s – I remember because I was there, learning it – but we lost sight of it somewhere along the line. We are back to needing to teach boys it’s okay to love other boys, regardless of orientation. Bert and Ernie are good for that.

 So Muppets, gay or straight, aren’t the issue I have here. The issue I have is with the petition itself. The fight for recognition and equality and the petition that gets all the attention is about Muppets? If you believe same sex marriage is a major milestone within the community or if you believe it is a distraction from bigger problems, you have to wonder about this. Okay, maybe you don’t. I do, though.

If we’re going to be discussing same sex marriage, let’s talk about it the context of Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell (DADT). Because even once DADT is repealed later this month, the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) still stands and because of DOMA gay partners of gay soldiers don’t get the same benefits as their straight counterparts. No, they don’t have to hide any longer. The partner just doesn’t officially exist. No legal standing, no i.d., no benefits, no housing or commissary access.

Sure, the repeal of DADT is new and all the details haven’t been worked out yet, but DADT ends this month. There are still military families in limbo, in half-space, because without DADT they exist – but with DOMA, they don’t exist.

If we’re going to talk about same sex marriage, why aren’t we talking about this? Why aren’t we yelling about this? Why are we focusing on a couple of puppets?

Again, I love those puppets. I know first hand how important Sesame Street and the Muppets are. But come on. If we’re going to have the dialogue, let’s make it matter.

Until next month, Poppets, take care of you.

August 2011

Hi Poppets! This month, I was a little crazy and making the move from Anchorage, Alaska to New Orleans, Louisiana at the time the article was due. While this relocation should make for some really great articles on the one hand, on the other, it made for sucky timing this month. Instead of a new article, we did a reprint. However, it seems my timing is good. From what I'm reading online and hearing within the community, this issue (which never goes away completely) has reared its ugly head yet again. New stuff next month, I promise! Until then, Poppets, take care of you.

Hi Poppets!  I have a news flash: Gay men aren’t a fashion accessory.  This should be obvious but apparently, for some straight women, it’s not.  Now, in the interest of full disclosure, I need to tell you I am a fag hag to my dear friend, Rob, back in Massachusetts and I wear the title of fag diva proudly for my friend, Don, down in Florida.  Here’s the thing though: we worked on our relationships.  First and foremost, we are friends.  The labels are secondary and partly tongue in cheek.  And I have many gay friends with whom it wouldn’t dawn on either of us to use the term at all.

There is a debate around the term “fag hag” – is it derogatory, is it complimentary, is it a way of life or single relationship?  Its very definition is in question.  Regardless of how anyone answers those questions though, my issue is the same.  Somewhere along the line, a gay friend has become a favored trophy for a straight girl.  And I have a problem with that.

A friend of mine recently had to change his email address and shut down his blog because of a cyber stalker.  Her justification was that she was a fag hag so it was all okay.  He was supposed to ignore the numerous, lengthy, needy emails that flooded his inbox daily. Ignore her sending mail to his place of business addressed to “My Pickle.” Pretend she wasn’t looking for instant intimacy simply because she was a fag hag.  Ummm…no.

There are numerous web sites that women can join proclaiming their fag hag status.  Most of my gay friends have at least one horror story of being approached at parties or bars by near strangers asking to be, in essence, instant best friends.  Sure, we all have communities where we feel more comfortable than in others.  Sometimes, that’s the LGBT community for straight women.  I get this.  Trust me.  But, ladies, just because you are comfortable there doesn’t guarantee every man in the room wants to help you shop, dry your tears or pour out his soul while you eat ice cream tomorrow night.

If you consider being a fag hag a title for a single relationship, the way I do, or if you consider it a way of life, it still requires the agreement, consent and affection of the other person.  You have to be friends first.  You have to get to know him as a person, not as a token.  And save the unrequited crushes for movie stars, please.  A gay friend isn’t the way to avoid intimacy, isn’t a surrogate boyfriend, isn’t going to love you the moment you walk into his life just because you walked into his life.  If that’s what you want, get a dog.  Seriously.

Until next month, Poppets, take care of you.

July 1, 2011

Oooo! Poppets, I’ve started a trend! Back in May, I was lucky enough to interview a strong LGBTQ voice, Shawn Harris. This month, it’s Dennis R. Upkins, author of Hollowstone, social justice advocate, and really cool all-around guy.

Bridget Adams (BA): First and foremost, what’s Hollowstone about?

Dennis R. Upkins (DRU): Hollowstone is the story of Noah Scott whose changes drastically when he is accepted to Hollowstone Academy, one of the most prestigious boarding schools in the country set in the mountains of Eastern Tennessee. Within the hallowed halls of the illustrious school, Noah soon discovers that the world of the privileged is rife with social hierarchies, politics, depravity and corruption. It is also there that Noah meets his roommate and best friend, the charming and enigmatic Caleb Warner.

Tragedy soon strikes when Cal is brutally murdered in a hold-up. But when Noah is haunted by Cal’s ghost, he soon discovers that the random act of violence was in fact a premeditated one. Determined to uncover the truth and find Cal’s killer, Noah soon finds that the school and its patrons have more than their share of secrets. Secrets they are willing to preserve at any cost. Noah also quickly learns that greater supernatural forces are at play. In a race against time, Noah must solve Cal’s murder before he’s the killer’s next victim.

BA: What made you decide to write black and gay protagonists?

DRU: Being a double minority myself, I'm a firm believer in showcasing diversity, in a natural, honest, and respectful manner. And I've done it for so many years, now it's not even really a conscious decision. It's just second nature to me.

Some people may ask, why include marginalized characters? I ask, why not?

When it comes to people, straight white able-bodied middle class male is not the default. So for me it's not brain surgery or rocket science to have marginalized characters as the leads in a story.

BA: What challenges do your characters face as both Black youth and gay youth that may not be understood?

DRU: With Noah being the narrator, I think this is a chance for many white readers to get a glimpse of what it's like to be a person of color in the U.S. He's constantly on the receiving end of racial slurs (and I'm not even talking about the infamous "N-Word") and other racist harassment. We're talking about everything Confederate flags waving prominently throughout the town of Newton, to racial profiling by police officers. People are shocked when they learn that Noah is 1) at the school on an academic scholarship and not an athletic scholarship and not because of affirmative action. 2) he grew up in the suburbs and wasn't from the hood 3) that he speaks so well. And let's not forget the racist insults by classmates (I think he got called a house slave at one point), not to mention when two white female classmates clutched their purses (and the proverbial pearls) when he passed them in the lawn because they thought he was going to rob them in broad daylight.

Many people still have this failed mindset that blacks and other POCs (People of Color) are still on the receiving end of racism because they bring it on themselves because they can't get their acts together. And yet here we have Noah, who is a mild-mannered student. A gifted violinist, he makes straight-A's and is a devout Catholic. In fact, Cal's nickname for him is Altar Boy. And yet he's still catching this much bigotry.

Many whites believe that as long as they aren't burning a cross, wearing a white sheet, or screaming white power with a swastika branded on them, then they aren't "real" racists like the really bad white people. I think seeing the hardships that Noah, and for that matter Cassidy, endures will illustrate that it's the everyday racism from everyday white people that is even more destructive and more pervasive in our society than many whites may realize.

As for the three LGBT characters - Ryan, Neely, another character who comes out in the story -  the audience learns why it rarely gets better for queer people, especially in the telling of Ryan’s experiences. His story is a painful and sobering reminder of the abuse and hatred that gay teens face in high schools. And to be clear, Ryan is not an effeminate character, he's not flamboyant, he's not emo, he's not "flaunting his sexual preference," he's not trying to "push an agenda." He's simply a nice quiet kid who spends every waking moment apologizing for his existence and trying to blend into the background so he's left alone and that's not enough for his tormenters. Because the truth is, some people won't be happy until LGBTQs are dead. Ryan is also a cautionary tale why one should be careful about who they bully and that contrary to popular opinion, gay people do in fact fight back. Because when he's pushed when he's pushed too far, Ryan stops apologizing once and for all and takes his power back in a most spectacular manner.

I think one of the things that has surprised me about Hollowstone is how popular Neely has been as a character. I knew Cal would be popular, and I expected Noah to have some fans, but Neely has really struck a chord with a lot of readers and the common sentiment I continue to hear is that it's rare to find powerful bisexual characters who are portrayed in such a positive manner.

BA: This book has to be special to you simply because it is your first novel. I would imagine, though, that it resonates even more deeply for personal reasons. What does this story mean to you on that level?

DRU: I've joked many times with friends that Hollowstone is probably about as close to an auto-biography as I'll ever write. A good 80 percent of the novel is based on firsthand experiences. More than that, I think Hollowstone provides a critique on society by raising a mirror and calling out a lot of the injustices that plague society. The novel doesn't presume to have the answers and in fact it presents none. But I do think it's a candid look at our culture. Keeping that in mind, this would constitute that "Great American Novel" that most people dream about writing and few people actually do.

But more than that, I get to share this story with other people and that in itself has been a reward.

BA: Why do you think it is so rare to find LGBTQ characters in mainstream fiction?

DRU: I think the reason is obvious. Let's just keep it real. I think the reason it's so rare to find LGBTQ characters in mainstream fiction is for the same reason you rarely find POCs in mainstream fiction and the same reason why works by black authors are always shuffled off to the African-American section whether the genre of their work is sci-fi, fantasy, gay fiction, etc.

The publishing industry is a very bigoted one. Whitewashing book covers with POC protagonists is still the norm and this was the same BS that was done to album covers of black musicians during the 50s to make it more comfortable for white audiences to listen to "Negro music."

Let's also not forget that it was only two-months ago that a New York Times bestselling author was ordered to change her short story (which featured a gay pairing) into a heterosexual couple for an anthology. We also saw the fallout which occurred when the homophobia in the industry was called out.

You know art is supposed to be progressive and forward-thinking. It's supposed to enlighten society and challenge us to evolve and it's unsettling to see that seems to be less and less the case.

BA: What are the problems you see, as an author and as a reader, with most of the LGBTQ characters that are out there these days?

DRU: We're usually minor characters or sidekicks. And that's the best case scenario. More often than not, we're reduced to offensive stereotypes and caricatures. Degrading props to illustrate how and why cis straight people are so superior to us. Believe it or not. Not every gay man is effeminate, flamboyant and aspiring to new levels of "fabulous." Not every gay men is aspiring to be some honorary woman or to be a straight woman's fashion accessory.

Many of us are in fact masculine. Many of us are athletes, soldiers, and confident in who we are. Many of us know squat about design or fashion and couldn't care less. The only difference between us and our straight brethren is that we simply happen to be attracted to other men.

Believe it or not, most lesbians aren't militant, emasculating man-haters. Most of them are simply down to earth women who happen to love other women.

And with the exception of an elite few, I generally don't read gay fiction written by women for the same I reason I generally don't read works "tackling racism" that are written by white writers, for the same reason I surmise that many queer women don't read works depicting their sexuality from straight men.

In the case of many women writing gay fiction, it's heterosexism at play. Too often it's usually privileged women who are using a marginalized group as avatars to write out their fantasies. Because honestly many of these stories are as offensive to queer men as stories depicting queer women written by sexist straight men with a lesbian fetish.

The universal thread there: the writers are usually coming from a place of privilege who couldn't be bothered to do any actual research or garner any actual facts. Many of these privileged writers usually have a not-so-veiled agenda attached.

And while I would love to support more gay writers, a lot of the work I've been coming across is disheartening as well. A lot of the narratives are whiny, pretentious and indulgent and textbook cliches. The stories and the writing is horrid and I'm just wondering, how does this stuff get published?

As LGBTQs, we come in all ranges from all walks of life. We're more than our orientations just like cis-straight people but it's funny how that never gets explored. And the fact that I often have to find myself still arguing over this with people in the 21st century is quite disturbing in itself.

BA: Finally, where can we buy the book?

DRU: Hollowstone is available on Amazon in both print and Kindle. It's also available in other ebook formats on parker-Publishing.com. And if you need any other information, you can hit me up at http://dennisupkins.com.

And hit him up you should, Poppets. Hollowstone is a really excellent read, especially for LGBTQ and questioning youth – okay, really for anybody, but you know my soft spot for teens. Upkins is an even more excellent voice and one that needs to be heard. By as many people as possible. So read a book this month, and until next month, Poppets, take care of you.

June 2011

It’s that time of year again, Poppets: Pride!  You know I love Pride and this year is no different. You can find great events all over the area, including right here in Bellingham. However, since you can find these great events, rather than give you a laundry list – no matter how well written or humorous a laundry list – we’re talking about pride, with a lower-case ‘p’. If you need it, I recommend going here and here.

Now…pride. For every one of us who celebrates Pride, there is at least one who doesn’t. Who takes no pride in being part of our community. Gay men, lesbians, queers, transgendered people, bisexual men and women – people who should be able to take pride, who should feel a part of the LGBTQ community. After all, that’s what the word community means. Yet they feel no pride, so why celebrate Pride?

It would be easy to say they need to get over themselves; to lay it at their feet. It would be easy and, goodness knows, it would be more convenient. If it is their fault, their problem, then we don’t have to look at how we might have contributed to these feelings. After all, no one is responsible for our feelings but ourselves; no one can make you feel inadequate without your permission. Blah, blah, blah. We know all the catch phrases. Honestly, I’m even a fan of these phrases. I believe them to be true.

I also believe the overuse of these catch phrases is a cop-out. We use them to be able to insult people, to be cruel, to be dismissive, all while being able to blame the very person we have just tried to hurt if they actually get hurt by the fact that we have just tried to hurt them. How is that even logical?

But, what does this have to do with Pride or even with us? Because there is a hierarchy within our community. We like to pretend there isn’t. We like to pretend that, as an oppressed group, we come together in unity. We like to pretend we are a united front against those with straight privilege. Sadly, if you talk to more than a handful of bisexual people, you will discover this isn’t the case. If you talk to gays and lesbians of color, you will discover racism is as rampant among us as it is within the straight community. If you get to know transgendered people – do you even know a transgendered person? – you will hear stories of his or her “community” being as judgmental as the cis-world.

You don’t want this to be true. I don’t want this to be true. But as adults, we know that wanting something to be different doesn’t automatically make it so. We have to work to change it. I think Pride would be a good time to start or continue that work. Recognize where you have privilege, because most of us carry it somewhere. Watch your humor and your jokes. If someone doesn’t think you’re funny, let that be about you, not about them. Admit that yes, even as the focus of bigotry, we can still be bigoted. Don’t use politically correct words just because you know them; really think about why they are important and change the way you think, not just the way you speak.

If we can start here, with Pride, with ourselves, maybe we can open the community to pride. It’s worth a shot.

Until next month, Poppets, take care of you – and each other.

May 2011

* Note: Updated performance dates in the comments section!*

One of my favorite aspects of writing for The Betty Pages is getting to find all the events that are going on within the community. Since leaving Boston, that usually means what’s happening in the Pacific Northwest, but every now and then, something on the east coast catches my eye and I have to share it with you. This month is one of those times. Because really, this is good, Poppets.

Last year, I learned about a hot, new playwright, Shawn C. Harris. Shawn is a triple minority – Black, female, and queer – so I was particularly interested in hearing her voice. Fingers crossed, hoping it wouldn’t suck, I read her play, Tulpa or Anne&Me. Oh my God. This was so far beyond simply not sucking.

Tulpa is truly breathtaking. In a raw, honest way, she explores the relationship between two women as they deal with and explore how race affects them as they move from strangers to lovers to possibly friends. Her ability to acknowledge that which unites us as women, and yet push us to face the systemic racism that divides us is rare and valuable.

Since the staged reading of it last year, Tulpa has taken off – and rightly so. Instead of simply passing away into obscurity as so often happens with the work of people of color or members of the LGBTQ community, the show is a featured stage production of the Planet Connections Theatre Festivity 2011 on June 19th in New York City (866-811-4111 for tickets if you or anyone you know is going to be in the area). Yep, Shawn’s gone big-time! So, imagine my delight and surprise when she and her director/co-producer Sara Lyons, agreed to do an interview with me (and told me to call them by their first names, nonetheless).


Bridget Adams (BA): The PCTF website describes the play like this:
Tulpa, or Anne&Me explores a strange friendship that begins with an artist whose lonely world gets turned upside down when Anne Hathaway crawls out of her television. As their friendship blossoms, they begin to examine how race impacts their lives as women, as friends, and as human beings.

How would you describe it? What is it to you, Shawn, as the author?

Shawn Harris (SH): LOL! I wrote that description for PCTF, so I'd say it's fairly accurate of the plot. What the description doesn't get is how the play speaks to my generation's experience with and ideas about race. Ditto gender and sexuality. We were born years, even decades, after the landmark events of the civil rights, women's liberation, and gay rights movements. All that was literally before our time. Back then, it was said that the personal is political. Now we're seeing how the political is also personal.

Sara Lyons (SL): ditto on what Shawn said :)

BA: The show is challenging from an artistic standpoint, in that your actors have to have a level of talent that we aren’t always seeing these days. I imagine, dealing with the issues of race, racism, and social justice in such a raw, honest way was also a challenge when it came to casting. Were there difficulties in finding people who were talented enough to embrace the roles but were also open enough to address the issues?

SH: Yes and no. So much of what's out there is stereotypical and doesn't offer much to the talent that's out there. As for casting, it's not just the subject matter that makes it hard, it's the nature of the main character too - not just as a queer Black woman, but as a person. She doesn't lend herself to expressing herself easily, but that's kind of the point of the character. But actors - especially stage actors - are often trained to be very expressive, so facing a character who is so intensely reserved can be particularly difficult.

SL: To a certain extent, yes. But in my experience working on shows with social justice themes, I have often found that the more openness and trust that I approach the work and my collaborators with, the more they often surprise and delight me with their passion and interest in the issues at hand. I think the fact for a lot of people is that they have never had the opportunity to honestly engage with social justice issues, particularly race--they haven't had the particular privilege of taking lots of expensive women's studies classes in college, for example--and when they are actually given a safe, nonjudgmental, and stimulating environment to get into it, it can be a novel, transformative, and enlightening experience. When I'm casting a piece like this, I don't necessarily look for someone who is a self-described activist, or someone who makes their living doing social justice work (not that that isn't wonderful!)--I look for people who have heart, and who are unabashedly honest. As the play develops in rehearsal, it is that person who will discover that social justice is just as much about what is in your heart as it is about who's in the White House. That valuing of heart and honesty is also a huge part of what makes a quality actor. So, I often find the pieces actually fit together well

BA: What was it about the two of you, Shawn and Sara, that made you realize you could produce this together?

SH: Since we're both passionate about social justice, we come at it with a shared vocabulary that makes it much easier to get certain ideas across. I don't have to explain basic concepts, which makes it a lot easier to go deeper more quickly. As a director who also knows actors, she can grasp the internal and external complexities of the story and communicate them in a way that works for the people who have to give it life. I'm a writer, so I know how to communicate, but that's not the same as being able to speak Actor.

Sara is remarkably open to challenging her assumptions about things, which is what this play is about. So when I send her resources that inform or explain a certain aspect of the play, I feel like that effort helps - even if she chooses not to use it. So that means she comes at it not as imposing upon the play, or merely regurgitating what's on the page, but interpreting itself in such a way that it reveals itself most fully. It's like the difference between textbook Mandarin conversations and Ezra Pound.

SL: Ditto on what Shawn said. We have mutual passions for social justice and for theatre, and we both believe in the effectiveness of social justice theatre both as art and as activism, so it was a natural fit. As a director, I am consistently blown away by Shawn's writing for it's raw honesty. She expresses truths about broad societal constructions in the most private, intimate communications between people. The ability to draw bridges between the personal and political, I think, is one of theatre's greatest strengths, and it's a task that really excites me as a director and as an activist.

Additionally, I think the two of us compliment one another in terms of the perspectives we bring to the script--we took different routes to social justice and to theatre, and have had very different experiences around race in our lives (I'm white). I think that working on Tulpa is a way for us to help each other express our distinct individual voices while we simultaneously discover and build ground around what we have in common. It's fulfilling, exciting, and so productive!


BA: Traditionally, the voices of people of color and from the LGBTQ community have been given far less respect than the voices of white, straight artists. Shawn, you are a minority. What resistance did you face getting Tulpa up originally?

SH: Triple minority! Not too many queer Black women getting a lot of theatre press.

To be honest, most of the resistance has come from myself. Many writers have this problem to an extent. I've questioned and doubted myself in ways that someone like, say, David Mamet probably doesn't. There's always that feeling that you don't measure up no matter what you do. There's always that suspicion that you're kidding yourself because there are so many other writers who said what you said better than you, so the world doesn't need what you have to offer.

But in a way that's kind of symptomatic of the systems that oppress women, people of color, and LGBTQ people. While physical violence is awful, I've found that the most dangerous and insidious effects have been psychological. I've had times when I've actually wondered to myself, "Maybe I'm just inferior. Maybe I'm simply not smart enough, strong enough, or righteous enough. Maybe it's right for me to be treated this way."

That interview Oprah had with Barbara Walters where she admits that she wanted to be White? I understand exactly what she meant.

BA: Where does the title come from?

SH: In a nutshell, tulpa is a term from Tibetan folklore that describes a being made real through willpower and imagination then takes a life of its own.

SL: Shawn said it. What I find most intriguing about the definitions of "tulpa" is the idea that through a nexus of desire, imagination, and necessity, a human being can literally will something into reality. It's an evocative, theatrical concept, and it also brings interesting perspective into thinking about how to create a more just society.

BA: The goal of the show seems to be (to me anyway) to create honest dialogue
around race and racism. Do you think it’s succeeding?

SH: I think it's too soon to say, but the feedback I've been getting about it makes me feel hopeful in a way that I haven't felt in a very long time.

SL: A small number of people have seen or read it so far, but there have been really encouraging responses. A white, straight man who read it said that it influenced his ideas about race and his own whiteness more than anything he'd ever read or seen before. One person's reaction doesn't necessarily mean other people will react similarly, but I do think it's true that this script has the potential to inject a new level of heart and understanding into how we understand race on the most personal levels. That's absolutely what it's done for me.

BA: Has anything unexpected come from the writing and producing of Tulpa?

SH: Definitely! Working on Tulpa, or Anne&Me has taught me something very important: to challenge my expectations. Most of the people who've been supporting Tulpa, or Anne&Me from the beginning have not been artists or activists or academics, but regular people who've read the script or checked out Tulpa's IndieGoGo campaign and said, "Yes, this is what I need to see," or "Finally! Someone who's talking about this like a real person and not a pundit," or "Thank God! Someone understands!"

SL: I completely echo Shawn's words about learning to challenge your own expectations. With a traditional theatre background in addition to a background in women's/gender/sexuality/race studies, I always fear that I won't feel validated as both an artist and activist when I'm constantly moving between both worlds. What I'm learning as I delve more fearlessly into combining these passions is that they don't have to be so different. Directing is largely about envisioning something original and effective and then guiding that vision into tangible existence. So is being an activist. It takes a lot of faith, and the more I believe in my own work, the more positive and energetic the response tends to be--from both the theatre and the social justice worlds.

For more information, contact me at lifeandtimesofbridget@gmail.com or go to http://www.indiegogo.com/tulpa2011 and see why I’m so excited. Last year, I was looking forward to hearing Shawn’s voice. This year, I’m looking forward to everyone else hearing it. So, keep an ear out for Shawn C. Harris and Sara Lyons, Poppets, and remember, you heard their names here first.

Until next month, Poppets, take care of you.